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[personal profile] darthfi
For janni, who dared me.


At first glance, it wasn't a match made in heaven.

Globe prided itself on its ancient heritage, Vic disparagingly pointed out that it, in fact, had been around for much longer than any cheap mock-Tudor tourist trap of a revival.

Globe made smug comments about populist pap and celebrity factors; Vic coughed "hack writer" after Shakespeare's name and made pointed comments about Doctor Who.

But the fact was that they were missing something. Vic had never quite recovered from Edmund Kean's rude words to the audience in 1824 and had taken to drink until being forcibly dried out by Emma Cons. Globe had never recovered from its failure to save Rose = "just like Doctor Who", bitched Vic - and the fact that it had never got a proper perspective, despite one having been planned on first construction.

And it was becoming clear that they had much in common. Vic liked to dominate, as the young 'un could testify; while Globe currently had no top.

It was inevitable, they supposed. And one day, they decided to consummate their relationship, flinging caution to the winds and hurtling towards each other with wild abandon until the South Bank complex, full of its importance as the National Theatre, decided that this was unacceptable and, true to its Brutalist nature, put a short, abrupt end to all that palaver.

Vic slunk back to Waterloo, where it lurked across from Baylis Road, brooding over its ills. Globe returned home and took out its frustrations on its audiences, soaking the groundlings with its sprinkler system on sunny days.

Meanwhile, National Theatre and Festival Hall looked at each other across Waterloo Bridge, serene in the knowledge that once more, they had protected the morality of London theatre.
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darthfi

September 2009

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